There is a passage in the bible 1 Corinthians 13:4-13 ESV that speaks on the real meaning of love. We all have our own definitions but the fact of the matter is Love takes on all forms but I choose to stand on what is written in the bible.
Of course there are a few different types of love which are as follows: Eros (Erotic Love, named after the Greek god of love and fertility.) Philia (Affectionate Love, to show affection for someone friend or family.) Storge (Familiar Love, something that feels familiar to you and someone else.) Ludus (Playful Love, having fun with someone, hanging out enjoying each other’s time.) Mania (Obsessive Love, constantly obsessing over something or someone. Not really love but the illusion of love.) Pragma (Enduring Love, a love that never grows old no matter how far apart you are from someone.) Philautia (Self Love, something we all need in order to even understand what love means.) Agape (Selfless Love, giving of one’s self or thinking of others and not always putting yourself before another.)
With these different types of love, which ones do you possess? I am sure at times we have all had a go with at least 4 out of the 8 if not all. I know for me, I can be honest and say I have experienced them all. The ones that I choose to possess in my life are Eros, Philia, Ludus, Pragma, Philautia, and Agape. I choose these because although I am not perfect, I try and think on the lines of “What would Jesus do?” No one will ever fill His shoes but they can sure work at trying. No greater selfless love was when He was willing to sacrifice His life for mine. He loved those that didn’t love Him back. He healed, mended, and even spoke to those that most of us would leave on the side of the curb just by the way they looked. As for Eros, well that should be self explanatory, not to mention, there are different types of Erotism.
I am learning that in dealing with relationships, not all of them are meant to be in your life for a lifetime but in it for a season. Yes, we’ve heard this before but it is a really true statement. Those that come by for a season are to teach us lessons. In this passage I’m speaking strictly on love. Those that stop by for a season are merely meant to teach us a lesson and then move on to the next. Or if we missed the lesson, then they will surely continue to stop by until we have learned the lesson.
I am currently on Philautia Love (Self Love) and Agape Love (Selfless Love), knowing when to turn all that love on self and be selfish with myself. Understanding that there is nothing wrong with taking time for one’s self and not owing any explanation to anyone. If there is a need for explanation then it shall be given otherwise, it is just my time. In giving selfless love, I am learning when to not push but be patient and understanding. It is not easy to give Agape Love simply because we have to learn when to back away. Yes, in my opinion, Philautia and Agape can become intertwined. Knowing when to let go for your own sake and happiness but also being able to see past yourself to truly see someone else. We never know what a person is going through and to really see that, we have to remove what we may want from that person to see that maybe they are not ready to give it’s called understanding.
Many may not agree with me but that is quite alright because there is such a thing as “Agreeing to Disagree.” My life has been nothing but lessons and retakes and that is quite alright with me. I have never been too proud of learning and receiving correction. For as long as I am on this earth, I will continue to learn and share my lessons. There is always someone out there that needs a message. My job is to give the message and plant the seed.
Be gentle with yourselves and watch how others become gentle with you. Love can be amazing in any form you receive or give. Blessings and Love.